In my last post, I admitted to completely giving up my humble ideals in order to have a 'big' (in our little universe, at least) wedding. I feel I should explain myself a little bit, at least. We've had many friends get married over the last couple of years. Not one of those weddings was a small affair. They varied in style and cost, but all were celebrations of the love that our friends shared for one another. I really think that my life is richer for having been a part, large or small, of all of those weddings. I'm grateful to know so many people who have found their life partner, and that they chose to let me share in some small part the expression of their love by attending their weddings.
In short, I hope that with our wedding, David and I are able to give back some of the joy that we have experienced at all these other weddings. If we were to elope, that couldn't happen. That may not be a good reason, but it's ours.
Love and kisses,
The Fiancee
Thursday, December 31, 2009
Sunday, December 6, 2009
Weddings & Money - Part One
Weddings cost money. Everybody knows this. It is the ugly truth of weddings, the ever-present elephant in the room. In short, weddings are just one big racket (Steph, I'm sorry if you are reading this...feel free to rebut, or just tell me about affordable options in the central MA area :)) This is why I decided a long time ago that I wanted to elope. What is the use of spending thousands of dollars for ONE DAY? In my opinion, the purpose of a wedding is just a formality to acknowledge that you want to spend the rest of your life with another person.
Ah...but that was B.E. (Before Engagement). Once you have that little sparkling ring on your hand, it is oh so easy to let your imagination run away with you. 'OK,' we thought, ' so we'll do a small wedding, just around 20 people.'
"Well, well, look who's too good to invite her own family to her wedding? Look who moved to California and suddenly doesn't have room in her life for her family." (This, by the way, is a completely fabricated accusation, but one that haunted me for a couple weeks.)
So. We put together a guest list of family and friends--totaling around 130 people. (I've been told that this is on the small side, so I guess I should be grateful about that? I must know some people who know some very rich other people if they can afford to have hundreds of people come to all of these weddings.) It's true that not everyone on that list will come, especially since it is in MA and so many of our friends live in CA. BUT WHAT IF THEY DO? On the one hand, great! On the other...yikes. In case you were wondering, the latter hand is the one holding the wallet.
What in the world happened to my high ideals about not spending money on this? How did they suck me in???
...coming up in Part Two--The Vultures Surround Us...
Ah...but that was B.E. (Before Engagement). Once you have that little sparkling ring on your hand, it is oh so easy to let your imagination run away with you. 'OK,' we thought, ' so we'll do a small wedding, just around 20 people.'
"Well, well, look who's too good to invite her own family to her wedding? Look who moved to California and suddenly doesn't have room in her life for her family." (This, by the way, is a completely fabricated accusation, but one that haunted me for a couple weeks.)
So. We put together a guest list of family and friends--totaling around 130 people. (I've been told that this is on the small side, so I guess I should be grateful about that? I must know some people who know some very rich other people if they can afford to have hundreds of people come to all of these weddings.) It's true that not everyone on that list will come, especially since it is in MA and so many of our friends live in CA. BUT WHAT IF THEY DO? On the one hand, great! On the other...yikes. In case you were wondering, the latter hand is the one holding the wallet.
What in the world happened to my high ideals about not spending money on this? How did they suck me in???
...coming up in Part Two--The Vultures Surround Us...
Saturday, November 21, 2009
Engaged.
Wow. I’ve thought so much about getting to this point with D, but the reality is so surreal!
It's been a week, and I am still playing over the night, the moment, in my head. Some people asked if we had any pictures from the night. Honestly, that was the last thought in my head. It was such an intimate, personal time for the two of us, one that I really can't imagine sharing.
Oh, I'll tell you how it happened. I won't leave you hanging like that. Sorry to get all deep and philosophical for a minute.
One of my favorite spots in the city is what I call the Library Steps (I guess their 'real' name is the Bunker Hill Steps. Bygones.). It's a tall stairway leading from Olive Street in downtown down to 5th Street, ending right across from the amazing main branch of the library. They're a little curvy, and there's a little fountain running down the middle. For me, the steps are a wonderful example of living art...something beautiful yet functional, that hundreds of people traverse on a regular basis, without fully appreciating the experience. Having lived downtown my first year in LA, I became well-acquainted with these steps and inexplicably fell in love with them.
So. I made David aware of this very early on, probably on one of our adventures exploring this crazy city of ours. He stowed it away in his memory bank. A couple weeks ago he asked me if he could take me out to dinner. Our third anniversary was on the 17th, and he said he wanted to go out the weekend before, because really, who likes celebrating anything on a Tuesday? He insisted on planning everything, which DID make me a little suspicious, but I didn't want to get my hopes up, so I put any thoughts of rings and marriage out of my head (for a change).
Saturday night I got all dolled up, as did he, and we headed out. He started driving East, which immediately confused me. For some reason I got it in my head that we were eating somewhere by the beach. I rolled with it and sat quietly as D maneuvered towards downtown. Now, as I mentioned, I lived there for a year, and have been in LA for over 8 years now (yikes...). D always has to ask me where to go when we're down there, because he's just not very familiar with the area, but he was full speed ahead this time. He really wanted to surprise me!
We got to Figueroa and headed north. I was thinking maybe we were going to Ciudad, but he sailed right past there. We made our way up to Grand...and hit a big speedbump (metaphorically speaking). The whole road was blocked off right by Disney Hall for some event or another. D started swearing like a sailor, and I begged him to tell me where we were going so I could help guide him. Nothing.
After a detour, we finally ended up doing valet at McCormick & Schmick's, a great seafood restaurant that just happens to be AT THE TOP OF THE LIBRARY STEPS. Hm. D said that we weren't eating there, so I starting thinking MAYBE this was a little suspicious. We were going to have to walk down the steps to get where we were going.
We started down the steps, David smiling his cute little smile at me, holding my hand as he guided me in my heels down the steep stairway. Halfway down, he stepped over to the side. "What's that?" he asked me, beckoning towards a building connected to the steps. I looked to where he was pointing, saw only an office building and said as much. Hmmm. I noticed we stepped to the side just in time to let someone else walk down the steps. We were alone.
He stopped and looked at me, and told me he loved me. I smiled and replied in kind. He repeated, "I love you so much." He never says that. Holy crap.
THEN he says, "..and I want to spend the rest of my life with you."
Down on one knee he goes. Now this is kind of funny, because a friend was telling me the same thing happened to her. I know for sure that this was the point where he said, "Will you marry me?" but I don't remember exactly how it was phrased--it was all kind of fuzzy. He pulled out a box and opened it, and I took it from him, but didn't even look into it. I was too busy pulling him up and saying, "YES, of course I will" and kissing him an embarrassing number of times. It was so simple, and so perfect. I could not have asked for it any other way, and from any other person.
And the ring? It's beautiful and sparkly, and once we got it resized, fits like a glove. I can't stop looking at it.
For all you out there who were just waiting to hear about the dinner (yes, I do love my food), we DID get there eventually, and it was WONDERFUL. He took me to Cafe Pinot, and it was so worth all the hype. The pumpkin soup was delectable, the monkfish delicious, and the butterscotch panna cotta to DIE for. The perfect cap to one of the best evenings of my life.
Thanks for joining us on this crazy ride! Stay tuned for more rants and raves...
Emily (AKA The Fiancee)
It's been a week, and I am still playing over the night, the moment, in my head. Some people asked if we had any pictures from the night. Honestly, that was the last thought in my head. It was such an intimate, personal time for the two of us, one that I really can't imagine sharing.
Oh, I'll tell you how it happened. I won't leave you hanging like that. Sorry to get all deep and philosophical for a minute.
One of my favorite spots in the city is what I call the Library Steps (I guess their 'real' name is the Bunker Hill Steps. Bygones.). It's a tall stairway leading from Olive Street in downtown down to 5th Street, ending right across from the amazing main branch of the library. They're a little curvy, and there's a little fountain running down the middle. For me, the steps are a wonderful example of living art...something beautiful yet functional, that hundreds of people traverse on a regular basis, without fully appreciating the experience. Having lived downtown my first year in LA, I became well-acquainted with these steps and inexplicably fell in love with them.
So. I made David aware of this very early on, probably on one of our adventures exploring this crazy city of ours. He stowed it away in his memory bank. A couple weeks ago he asked me if he could take me out to dinner. Our third anniversary was on the 17th, and he said he wanted to go out the weekend before, because really, who likes celebrating anything on a Tuesday? He insisted on planning everything, which DID make me a little suspicious, but I didn't want to get my hopes up, so I put any thoughts of rings and marriage out of my head (for a change).Saturday night I got all dolled up, as did he, and we headed out. He started driving East, which immediately confused me. For some reason I got it in my head that we were eating somewhere by the beach. I rolled with it and sat quietly as D maneuvered towards downtown. Now, as I mentioned, I lived there for a year, and have been in LA for over 8 years now (yikes...). D always has to ask me where to go when we're down there, because he's just not very familiar with the area, but he was full speed ahead this time. He really wanted to surprise me!
We got to Figueroa and headed north. I was thinking maybe we were going to Ciudad, but he sailed right past there. We made our way up to Grand...and hit a big speedbump (metaphorically speaking). The whole road was blocked off right by Disney Hall for some event or another. D started swearing like a sailor, and I begged him to tell me where we were going so I could help guide him. Nothing.
After a detour, we finally ended up doing valet at McCormick & Schmick's, a great seafood restaurant that just happens to be AT THE TOP OF THE LIBRARY STEPS. Hm. D said that we weren't eating there, so I starting thinking MAYBE this was a little suspicious. We were going to have to walk down the steps to get where we were going.
We started down the steps, David smiling his cute little smile at me, holding my hand as he guided me in my heels down the steep stairway. Halfway down, he stepped over to the side. "What's that?" he asked me, beckoning towards a building connected to the steps. I looked to where he was pointing, saw only an office building and said as much. Hmmm. I noticed we stepped to the side just in time to let someone else walk down the steps. We were alone.
He stopped and looked at me, and told me he loved me. I smiled and replied in kind. He repeated, "I love you so much." He never says that. Holy crap.
THEN he says, "..and I want to spend the rest of my life with you."
Down on one knee he goes. Now this is kind of funny, because a friend was telling me the same thing happened to her. I know for sure that this was the point where he said, "Will you marry me?" but I don't remember exactly how it was phrased--it was all kind of fuzzy. He pulled out a box and opened it, and I took it from him, but didn't even look into it. I was too busy pulling him up and saying, "YES, of course I will" and kissing him an embarrassing number of times. It was so simple, and so perfect. I could not have asked for it any other way, and from any other person.
And the ring? It's beautiful and sparkly, and once we got it resized, fits like a glove. I can't stop looking at it.
For all you out there who were just waiting to hear about the dinner (yes, I do love my food), we DID get there eventually, and it was WONDERFUL. He took me to Cafe Pinot, and it was so worth all the hype. The pumpkin soup was delectable, the monkfish delicious, and the butterscotch panna cotta to DIE for. The perfect cap to one of the best evenings of my life.
Thanks for joining us on this crazy ride! Stay tuned for more rants and raves...
Emily (AKA The Fiancee)
Friday, November 20, 2009
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